Real lesbians are born lesbians

Real lesbians, meaning those who are born lesbians and not just influenced by peer groups, can attest to the fact that there is no medication or special therapy which can make a difference in their sexual orientation. Lesbians and gays will always be what they are regardless of religious backgrounds, medication or therapy programs.

Emotional struggle to effect change

It’s an emotional struggle to effect change in once life. So much so for a lesbian. A lesbian who tries to change herself from lesbian to straight will be faced with a lot of emotional issues. She will be battling against herself in favor of what she believe is the right thing to do. She will experience an infighting between herself and her feelings which can result in depression and, sometimes, suicidal thoughts.

Religion can play a big role

While religion has a great influence in changing a lesbian to go straight, religion can at times be overtaken by the way a lesbian feel towards herself and her desires and wants. However, religion can have a huge impact in how a lesbian behaves. Religion can tame or influence a lesbian to refrain from seeing or dating persons of the same sex, but not completely erase herself as being a lesbian.

Married Lesbians

There are lesbians who settle with men as a way to escape or hide their sexual preference. Others are of the belief that they are straight, marry the man of their dreams, but later on find themselves in a trap, realizing later in their married life that they are lesbians. While some of these relationships would go a long way, tendencies are high that the lesbian will turn her way back to her old self. Others will be left with no choice because of family obligation.

Real lesbians will always be lesbians

What can make a difference in a lesbian’s life is not religion, medication or therapy. There is nothing that can change a lesbian for who she is. A lesbian will always stay a lesbian, unless she is not a true lesbian or is just influenced by peers or the environment she lives in.

There are six basic universal emotions that you can try on. These basic emotions are joy, anger, disgust, fear, sadness and surprise. For example, a lesbian who cannot accept what she feels toward a friend or a lesbian who doesn’t know how to express her feelings towards a person of the same sex may want to exercise the above emotions.

A friend confided her story that she was head over heals towards her childhood friend. There were many sleepless nights just thinking about her and numerous phone calls just to hear her voice. It was a secret feeling that surprised her. She felt sad about it, was disgusted about her feelings for fear of being dumped and ridiculed. In the end, realizing that she cannot afford to loose a friend, she works toward acceptance which, in the end, brings her joy. Accepting herself for who she is and that there are things in life that she cannot have  made her more joyful and happy. As a result, she felt she has accomplished something big for herself.

So, how do you accept that you are a lesbian?

A lesbian relationship is usually frowned upon but there are lesbian relationships that have gained acceptance in society.

Acceptance is the key. A lesbian who accepts who she is have accepted the things she cannot change. The above story is a clear example of how you can play your own emotion if you want to go against your feelings towards persons of the same sex.

• Be aware that you are lesbian
• Keep in mind that you didn’t choose to be a lesbian
• Know that you are not alone
• Trust in yourself
• Know your limitations
• Excel in everything you are capable of doing.

It is normal to have some feeling towards persons of the same sex, but it will only do you harm than good if you let it be especially when you feel sad, disgusted, angry and fear just thinking about it. Counter your feelings early on with some emotional exercises and do it not only for yourself but also for your friend.

The benefits of exercising your emotions enhances individual’s well being and let you build a strong friendship in the end.

Be willing to accept who you are and where you belong.

In an article entitled, “Sexual Functions in Lesbians and Lesbian Relationships”, published by the Institute for Personal Growth, the American Psychiatric Association officially de-classified homosexuality as a mental illness and most healthcare professional have gradually accepted the view that being lesbian is a sexual variation rather than a disease.

They are normal except that they have unique needs and concerns and people should try to understand that and be open to their unique identities.

The struggle of lesbians for acceptance come in so many ways. An article entitled, “Lesbians and Gays are not abnormal“, it mentioned of Indian lesbians and gays continued fight for their rights for over 15 years. They petitioned for the repeal of Section 377 of the Indian Penal Code.

Lesbians, no matter how they feel towards people of the same sex, are normal. They are just who they are. No matter what people say, lesbians are still God’s creation just like everybody else. People should learn to provide space for every human being to live and love with freedom, dignity and respect irrespective of sexual orientation.

So, can you hide your sexuality? It is very difficult to hide your sexuality if you are a lesbian. It’s even more difficult if you have been raised in a strict or religious family.

With the best intention of being true to ourselves, there are occasions when pressures from relatives and friends might cause you to live life as a straight person even when you know, deep down, you are gay.

Often, counselling can be of benefit, but it won’t really help if you know that you are not who you pretend to be. Your sexuality will always reveal the truth in yourself because it is part of your physical, emotional, intellectual, and social self. It affects how you think of yourself and how you relate to others, as well as how they relate to you, and it is a part of you throughout your entire life.

Males tend to have a ring finger that is longer than their index finger (average: 1 to 0.96 ratio), while females typically have index and ring fingers of the same length.  According to John Manning, a biologist who first identified the significance of ‘finger digit ratios’, “females with masculine digit ratios have more masculine behaviors and males with a typically female ratio exhibit more typically feminine behaviors.” Girls with the male-type finger lengths tend to be more hyperactive. Lesbians are more likely to have this finger ratio.