Husband struggling with pain and jealousy because of wife’s lesbian affair

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y-woocomShould a husband leave his wife to ease his pain and jealousy over wife’s lesbian affair? Or should he support her all the way on whatever makes her happy, thereby, bear all the pain and jealousy?

This is a letter from husband who endured lots of pain and jealousy because of wife’s lesbian affair.

Wife Has a Lesbian Affair

Pardon me as a man for reading and joining in. My wife is in love with a lesbian. She is still in love with me too. There are many complexities which I don’t need to go into here, but I do want to say that we have all been making it work for more than six years now. This dyke was attracted to my wife and became her best friend for about a year before letting her know about her attraction. When she did begin to try to draw her to her sexually, she talked with me about it at key points. They didn’t sleep together or even kiss before we all agreed it was all right. I was willing for my wife to have a woman lover but I had no idea how far they would go. Everything said here about how only a woman can give a woman what she needs, and about the feeling of intensity and addiction, rings true to their experience. Yes I have struggled with lots of pain and jealousy. But I can see my wife’s happiness and knowing that she still loves and wants me makes such a difference. All the relationships between us have grown close and intimate over time. If this dyke hadn’t gone with her heart feelings none of this would have happened. On balance I am glad she was not prudent or careful.

What Does Not Kill You Makes You Stronger

The husband should weigh a million times before ever thinking of leaving the wife because of the pain and jealousy the lesbian affair brings. He should keep in mind why he married his wife in the first place.

The husband should think that:

  1. Lesbian affairs usually will not last long
  2. There are many ways of making his wife want him more
  3. Perhaps relocating to a new place could help save the marriage
  4. Getting a counseling is helpful
  5. There is no other way but to accept his wife for who she is with the hope that the lesbian affair will stop

There is no point keeping the wife, however, when there is no love anymore. But, as long as the love is still alive, the marriage vows is worth fighting for.

Remember the days you were still courting your wife. If you have to do it again, do it. Make your wife want you more instead of surrendering your manhood. Be a man and fight for your wife and for what you believe in is right. If you are concerned about your wife’s happiness. Sit down and talk to her, heart and soul. If she says she still loves you then maybe she is just confused of how things are going for herself. If that’s the case, things are in your favor. Make her believe that your marriage is worth saving than the lesbian affair. Go on a vacation. It’s a healthy way of rekindling the past.

If you are into this situation, what will you do? Any thoughts?



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